{"id":5832,"date":"2013-09-14T20:25:55","date_gmt":"2013-09-14T20:25:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/steampunkopera.wordpress.com\/?p=5832"},"modified":"2013-09-14T20:25:55","modified_gmt":"2013-09-14T20:25:55","slug":"yiddish-curses","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/yiddish-curses\/","title":{"rendered":"Yiddish Curses"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So i ran across a couple sites that\u00a0have these Yiddish curses. I grew up with this sort of humor, and i gotta say, these are brilliant. So i&#8217;m reprinting my favorites here. Cause why not? In honor of Yom Kippur for those who observe.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>May you have twelve healthy children.<br \/>\nAnd then may someone give one of them a whistle.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May they find thousands of new cures for you each year.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you run to the toilet every three minutes or every three months.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you have devoted children to chase the flies off your nose.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May your daughter&#8217;s beauty be admired by everyone in the circus<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you grow so wealthy you can afford only the finest specialists.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May they name a baby after you!<\/li>\n<li>(Traditionally, babies are named after *dead* relatives.)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>You should find a gold piece on the sidewalk and be so arthritic you can&#8217;t pick it up.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Your nose should grow so much hair it strains your soup.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May your blood turn to alcohol so all the fleas on your body get drunk and dance the mazurka in your belly button!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May the sun and the spring breeze warm you and caress you like an apple as you hang from a tree.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May your bones be broken as often as the Ten Commandments.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May he have a big store full of goods: may people not ask for what he has, and may he not have what they ask for.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you back into a pitchfork and grab a hot stove for support.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>&#8220;Your head should be full of lice but your arms should be too short for you to scratch.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you lose all your teeth, except for one &#8212; and *that* one should hurt!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you win a lottery,<br \/>\nand spend it all on doctors.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you live in a house with a hundred rooms,<br \/>\nand may each room have its own bed,<br \/>\nand may you wander every night from room to room,<br \/>\nand from bed to bed,\u00a0 unable to sleep.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>May you grow so rich that your widow&#8217;s second husband<br \/>\nnever has to worry about making a living.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So i ran across a couple sites that\u00a0have these Yiddish curses. I grew up with this sort of humor, and i gotta say, these are brilliant. So i&#8217;m reprinting my favorites here. Cause why not? In honor of Yom Kippur [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5832","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","clearfix"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5832","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5832"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5832\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5832"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5832"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5832"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}