{"id":3326,"date":"2012-06-26T14:49:01","date_gmt":"2012-06-26T14:49:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/steampunkopera.wordpress.com\/?p=3326"},"modified":"2012-06-26T14:49:01","modified_gmt":"2012-06-26T14:49:01","slug":"twilight-paintings-or-i-walk-the-douche-line","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/twilight-paintings-or-i-walk-the-douche-line\/","title":{"rendered":"Twilight Paintings (and douche)"},"content":{"rendered":"

And by twilight paintings is do NOT mean paintings of ******* Edward whatshisname the douchey, twinkly vampire. I would shoot myself in the ***** first. No, only slightly less douchey, today we feature paintings of twilight.<\/p>\n

Now i know what you’re saying. “Paul, for someone who’s taking the piss out of Twilight for being douchey and admittedly<\/em> a). it is<\/em> b). I LOVE Twilight and you suck (although it’s still pretty douchey i just love it anyway) your idea for a post today is preeeetty damn douchey. Paintings of twilight? Dude, that’s douchey.”<\/em><\/p>\n

Yes, i admit the douche potential is strong with this one, BUT… but but but it’s all in the execution. I lay out my case as follows:<\/p>\n

Cool:<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Venice 1908, Monet<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Douchey:<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight fucking Eve<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

See? Douchey is a CHOICE. \u00a0It’s not like being gay. Being gay means you want to have sex with other women\/men but it is your choice if you have sex with DOUCHEY women or men.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Evening Twilight at Acapulco, Diego Rivera 1956<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

“Oh yeah? Well I’VE never had sex with a douchey partner. All my partners are hot and killer.<\/em>” In that case, i hate to say it, but YOU are their douchey partner.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight, Gwendolyn Kerber<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

“Oh so YOU’VE never been someone’s douchey partner?”<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Up North, Bonnie Mincu<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Let’s see…. i’ve been the dirtbag partner, the dumbass partner, the dy-no-MIIIIITE partner… the dickhead, the the daring, the dashing, the dork… no…. nope, not the douche. Okay, maybe a time or two way back.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight in New Orleans, Diane Millsap<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The doucheBAG partner… yeah, defintiely the doucheBAG. But that is NOT technically the same at all.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Visions, Lena<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Do women even douche at all anymore? Didn’t that, like, die out in the 70s? Damn, the crap women have had to put with.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Landscape, Theodore Rousseau 1850<\/dd>\n
<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Look, the point is this, twilight is the bestest time of the entire day. THE BEST. PERIOD. It’s awesome. It is NOT douchey.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Summoning, Richard Hescox<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Yes, okay, i realize these pics are gorgeous and it’s better if i don’t talk.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Twilight Time, Maya Green<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"
Twilight Repose, Yoram Raanan<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"
Twilight Fantasy, Edward Robert Hughes<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"
Twilight in the Wilderness, Frederic Edwin Church<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"
Twilight zone over bas strait<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

And by twilight paintings is do NOT mean paintings of ******* Edward whatshisname the douchey, twinkly vampire. I would shoot myself in the ***** first. No, only slightly less douchey, today we feature paintings of twilight. Now i know what […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[32,285],"class_list":["post-3326","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-art","tag-paintings","clearfix"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3326","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3326"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3326\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3326"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3326"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulshapera.com\/temp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3326"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}